AI, Parenting, and the Myth of “Losing the Human Connection”

I was recently reading an article in The Atlantic about AI and parenting that left me uneasy and honestly a little annoyed—not because it raised concerns regarding the use of AI I hadn’t thought about, but because of how it framed the conversation. The piece suggested that parents turning to AI for help do so at the expense of outsourcing the very “human” aspects of parenting– the connections we build with our kids, the communities we form, the memories we create. 

I agree with the author on a few key points– parenting is deeply human. It is messy, emotional, exhausting, and beautiful in ways that no machine can replicate. I also agree that AI needs to be used responsibly and with care because, just like social media and the internet, the more we rely on technology for human connections, the more isolated and lonely we as a society can (but not necessarily do) become. 

Where I parted ways with the author, however, was in the suggestion that by using AI, parents are doomed to replace both the human aspects of parenting that hold true value and the community human connections and needs create. 

The “Village” That Isn’t There

We’ve all heard the phrase, “It takes a village to raise a child.” But most modern parents—especially mothers—will tell you flatly: there is no village. Our families are spread out, our neighbors are strangers, our schedules are overloaded, and the pandemic only served to deepen those fractures.

So when the article suggests AI will replace the human community, I couldn’t help but think to myself– what community? For many of us, the “community” looks like listening to a parenting podcast while unloading the dishwasher, or scrolling through blogs at midnight for advice we’re too tired to apply. Those don't seem to be the deeply human connections the author seems to be romanticising, yet are real life lifelines for support, help and parenting information for most parents in 2025. Unlike the image of a village of people just waiting to answer all your wildest parenting questions in your time of need, a podcast or blog don’t involve direct contact with another human being yet are, at its core, one of the most deeply rooted ways humans have evolved to connect– through written language and story telling. 

We rely daily on technology to augment the human experience as parents. That saved instagram post from Parentmap about top 5 parks for kids in your area? The blog post on 10 Halloween activities to do with kids under 5? These are all examples of something considered less personal (the internet) that can lead us to a human experience that may be incredibly meaningful to us and our children. 

My opinion– AI doesn’t have to replace community. In fact, for many parents (as is true for me), it might be the first tool that makes enough space in our lives to actually seek one out. If my Mom Brain Assistant can clear an hour in my week by handling the mental clutter of grocery lists, school emails, or vacation planning, that’s an entire hour I can spend connecting with friends, catching a Barre class or just laying on the floor doing puzzles with my kids.

The Wrong Problem

The article shared an anecdote about an AI birthday party planning app. The author describes contemplating using it after it surfaces in her social media feed but ultimately deciding not to use it. She describes the antithesis of this AI app as planning the party with her daughter, together, and thus choosing the more human experience over the tech solution. 

But here’s the reality– most moms aren’t sitting around happily scrolling Pinterest with their kids to dream up rainbow balloon arches and pick the perfect party streamers. Most moms do connect with their kids about themes, activities, guests and the good stuff (cake!). But they’re also staying up late after a full workday, toggling between Google, Amazon reviews, and half-baked Etsy shops, trying to piece together something extraordinarily magical and memorable while completely exhausted. And despite relying on “ready-made”  solutions like Amazon or Etsy instead of creating home-made decorations or baking a cake from scratch, I would argue most moms would still feel like they created a personal and memorable experience for their child.

I guess my argument is this– there is nothing “deeply human” about spending an hour researching which Elsa impersonator is both reputable and available at 2 p.m. on a Saturday. There is no “connection” in chasing down the cheapest bulk pack of biodegradable rainbow plates that will ship on time. Those are administrative tasks. Those are logistics. And they are very necessary to the actual execution of a birthday party. They are also invisible labor dressed up in this article as “deeply human” and seemingly an integral part of the overall experience. 

The 20/80 Problem

On the surface, things like planning a birthday party, back-to-school shopping, or even organizing a family trip look like bonding activities. But in reality? Only about 20% of that process is truly connective. And that 20% is priceless– sitting with my daughter as we shop for her school supplies, using the moment to ask how she feels about starting a new school, what she’s excited about, what she’s nervous about. That’s where magic exists. 

The other 80%? It is simply administrative noise—finding the right supply list, checking off every box, sourcing backpacks that are both durable and in stock, juggling the budget, and managing the sheer logistics of execution. This imbalance? Because that 80% is so heavy, it often crowds out the 20% that matters. That’s the mental load. 

The Real Scarcity: Time

At the center of this whole debate is something the article completely overlooked– time. Parents don’t lack the desire to connect with their kids. We often lack the time. Time is the most finite and precious resource in modern parenting—and the very thing most of us feel slipping through our fingers.

Every mom I know would rather spend their evening reading bedtime stories than buried in Amazon reviews for lunchboxes. Every mom I know would rather snuggle up with their child on the couch than hunting down a party vendor. It’s not willingness that’s missing. It’s time.

So the real question is: how do we get time back? And honestly, that was my impetus for creating Mom Brain. IMHO, AI is the perfect tool for this. AI, just like any technology, will never replace bedtime stories, snuggles, or the middle of the night hugs when they have their first bad dream. And I don’t want it to. But if it can help alleviate the 80% of the noise that chips away from the 20% that actually matters? It feels like an invaluable tool for giving me the breathing room to actually show up for the moments that matter.

A Different Vision

Any tool is what you make of it. The advent of the internet and of social media have, for some, replaced meaningful human connection. But for many of us, those tools have facilitated connections. I view AI in the same way. AI is not meant to replace my mom friends or replace me as a parent. If anything, it has given me a parenting expert in my back pocket, a restored sense of time and presence with my family, and the space for more creative projects like Mom Brain that take me beyond the roles of just mom or doctor (my day job). 

Parenting has always required a village. Right now, most of us don’t have one. Until we do, I believe AI can be the assistant we moms desperately need. Not to raise our children, but to help us reclaim the joy of raising them ourselves.

Megan,

Mom Brain 🧠

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